| Jergen Tavikya | |
|---|---|
| Number of Appearances | 1 |
| Played by | Mano Agapion |
| First Episode | Is That Chocolate, Or What? |
| Latest Episode |
|
Jergen Tavikya is a character played by Mano Agapion.
Biography
Jergen is likely European, but his specific national origins are as of yet unconfirmed. He claims to have grown up in "so many places", including Brazil, Switzerland, Canada, and Prussia ("when Prussia was a thing"). He was also trapped in a block of ice in Antarctica for five years. Jergen cites his nomadic upbringing as the source of his enigmatic accent, as well as his inability to "get most of anything that people say".
While Jergen never states his age explicitly, he claims to have lived in Prussia from 1990 to 1992, which means he is at least 28 years old.
Jergen claims to have begun his body modification process sometime within the past five years. He recieved the majority of his body modifications from one 'Dr. Blanche', who is currently in prison for the accidental murder of a man who wanted to become Orko from the 80's cartoon He-Man and The Masters of The Universe. Jergen called this murdered man "a close friend".
Because of Dr. Blanche's incarceration, Jergen has been unable to find another doctor willing to continue his body modification process. He has since resorted to capturing physicians in leaf-covered pitfall traps and forcing them to perform surgery on him.
Jergen frequently shows up unnanounced to little girl's birthday parties in hopes of finding one willing to take care of him. This tactic has had little to no success. He also has been repeatedly kicked out of 'Build-a-Bear Workshop' for frightening children.
Jergen's surgeries
Jergen has undergone various elective surgeries in order to fulfill his body modification goals. These include:
- Fat relocation to his midsection
- Fur grafts from abandoned F.A.O. Schwartz teddy bears
- Complete removal of his spinal column
- Hands repurposed into fluffy stumps (and encrusted in ground almonds)
- Nose removed (currently awaiting plastic replacement)
- Kangaroo pouch on his backside made of his own "reclaimed" human skin.
- Partial replacement of bones and non-essental organs with stuffing.
Jergen also lists many surgeries he has yet to recieve that he claims will complete his tranformation. These as-of-yet undone procedures include:
- Saucer-shaped ears
- Complete removal of his genitals
- Plastic nose (attempted previously but his body rejected it)
- Tape deck installed in his back á la Teddy Ruxpin
- Floppy legs
- Enlarged pupils
- Complete replacement of all bones and non-essential organs with stuffing
- Mouth replaced with a felt hole
Jergen's ailments
Jergen suffers from a myriad of diseases and ailments due to the incomplete nature of his transformation. His hand stumps have become gangrenous. His lack of opposable thumbs requires him to eat all of his meals at restaurants and limit his food choices to items he can "slide right in", such as quesadillas (which he loves). He also had his driver's license revoked due to his inability to grasp a steering wheel. He requires the aid of a full-time assistant to facilitate his transportation.
Jergen's catchphrases
In anticipation of his Teddy Ruxpin tapedeck installation, Jergen has recorded a suite of catchphrases that will play when a child interacts with him. These include:
- "I'm your best friend, man!"
- "Hey! You gotta love me!"
- "Let's eat lunch today!"
- "Oh! Hello, you!"
- "Hey! Is that chocolate, or what?"
Appearances[]
| Episode | Release Date | Other Characters | Guests |
|---|---|---|---|
| 533: Is That Chocolate, Or What? | 2.25.18 | Debbie Creepy | Weird Al Yankovic, Mary Holland |